Excerpts from a dog and cat's daily diary

  • digitalMedia
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Post 3+ Months Ago

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY:

> > 8:00 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

> > 9:30 a.m. Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!

> > 9:40 a.m. Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!

> > 10:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!

> > 11:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

> > Noon - Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!

> > 1:00 p.m. Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!

> > 4:00 p.m. Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!

> > 5:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

> > 5:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!

> > 6:00 p..m. Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

> > 6:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!

> > 8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:

Day 183 of My Captivity:

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts....They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.
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Post 3+ Months Ago

  • brian
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Post 3+ Months Ago

brilliant!! although, id just like to say dogs are far cooler, they're capable of far more intelligent thought, they're just not bothered! :D
did u write that or did u get it somewhere? its cool.
  • Axe
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Post 3+ Months Ago

I'd still rather have one of these than either a cat or a dog (Well, or 21 of these as we currently have, lol)...

Image

They act like a cross between a puppy & a 2-year-old kid, but without the housebreaking/potty training, lol.
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Post 3+ Months Ago

brian: no, that's one of those things my friends and family keep flooding my inbox with. hahahaha

Axe: I had an Green Iquana named Cisco (DS9) for about 3 years till the poor thing died from a bacterial infection. I found out then that it was actually a Ciscette. ;)
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Oh man, I'm sorry to hear that..

We've got two iggies right now..

Skittles, who's a tad shy of 5ft long (he lives in an 8'x4'x8' outdoor enclosure), he's an absolute nutjob... He'll whip you for any and no reason whatsoever (including trying to feed him, lol).

Annie, who's a lil over 5ft long (she has her own 10'x5'x7' outdoor enclosure), is the biggest softy you ever saw. She was raised as a classroom pet for the first 2 years of her life, so she was getting petted & played with by a hundred kids all day every day. Unfortunately, she was fed Monkey chow during that time, which is why she's so much bigger than Skittles, yet 2 years younger. Animal protien is the worst thing you can give an iguana. Sure, they'll grow BIG, real quick on it, but it cuts their life less than half...

Here's our lil lunatic, with Annie in the background - they have since been split up, and now live in separate enclosures...

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  • digitalMedia
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Real Beauties!!! I haven't thought about Cisco in a long time. She used to love a good swim in a nice warm bath tub. She'd just do laps from one end of the tub to the other. *sniff sniff*
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Post 3+ Months Ago

awww

What you wanna do is get yourself a bearded dragon... They really are THE most amazing reptiles. Every one has a personality, and no two personalities are alike...

And, some of them like to swim too :)

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:)
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Post 3+ Months Ago

DigitalMedia: that is so funny!! I am on the cats side all the way!

Axe: I love those animals! When I was in malasia i interacted with them all the time! Their so neat!
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Probably not with this species, at least, not wild ones, they're indigenous to Australia, hehe.

But Malaysia does have its fair share of wild reptiles, I'd love to go see many of these reptiles in the wild...

Being in Florida though, I get to see plenty right here :)
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Funny stuff, dM!

For some reason Iguanas have always freaked me out...along with all of those nasty anoles running around my back yard! I did have the pleasure of interacting with a bearded dragon once, and I must say that they are pretty awesome. If I were to ever get any sort of reptile, it would definitely be a one of them!
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Well, hey, we're looking to breed this year, maybe you could come over and meet some of our guys and take a baby home? :)

Where abouts in Florida are you? We're in Sarasota.
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Heh, I already have two dogs, a hamster, two rabbits, and two horses (soon to be four) to take care of, but I might be interested in one in a year or two. Hrmm, I wonder what the reptile policy is in the average college dorm. :icontongue: I really can't imagine living without any animals at all.
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Post 3+ Months Ago

As long as it's not a 18ft+ Burmese Python, Reticulated Python or Anaconda, they usually don't mind ;)
  • digitalMedia
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Post 3+ Months Ago

quite a menagerie there Geekette. We get Anoles here in South Carolina too. They're absolutely everywhere.

My house is currently hosting 3 dogs, one of whom is just past 16 years old and still good and lively. (She's a West Highland White Terrrier)
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Axe wrote:
Probably not with this species, at least, not wild ones, they're indigenous to Australia, hehe.

But Malaysia does have its fair share of wild reptiles, I'd love to go see many of these reptiles in the wild...

Being in Florida though, I get to see plenty right here :)

Oh... I didn't know that... Oh well... I did see a lot of bearded dragons and those lizards that shoot blood out of their eyes + have a neck frill... I think their called frilled lizards? My apartment building was always filled with different lizards and snakes and monkeys... I think we had like 5 colonies of monkeys living in the next door jungle... (And no I am not joking, we literally had about 6 acers of jungle beside our apartment building and we were in the city!! It is insain!!)
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Yeah, Frilled Dragons are the ones with the big neck frill... The ones that squirt blood are the horned lizards.... There was a big article about them in Reptiles Magazine a coupla months ago.. real freaky lil things.
  • b_heyer
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Hahaha thats pretty funny. Back in like fifth grade I read a story from a mouses point of view, it was dick-and-jane-esque but was extremely funny:

"Eep oh o a cat. I must run from the cat. I must run faster!"

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