Florida is apparently retarded

  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

In the state of Florida you can leave your toothbrush on someones sink, your clothes in someones dryer, or anything else that remotely suggests that you've been living somewhere and that it's your primary place of residence, and they can't kick you out without going through the courts to have you legally evicted.

You can't put their stuff outside. You can't call the police and have them removed. The only way you can get them out that instant is if they commit an act of violence.
It doesn't matter whether they've been in your home for a year, just stayed the night, or asked to use the restroom and planted their toothbrush. Apparently police can't determine either way who's telling the truth, even if someone stinks of alcohol, and it's "not their responsibility" to explain how it works to you.

It doesn't matter who's name is on the lease, they don't have to produce any mail with their name and your address on it, it doesn't matter if every tennant in the home wants them to leave. There is absolutely nothing you can do.

Long story short, my younger brother lost his job because he partied every night and was late to work almost every day for weeks, or so he says. I still don't know what the real deal with that was because he applied for unemployment and was refused because the place said he quit and wasn't fired. Anywho, he has been staying here on and off for some time now, he'll be here a week then go hang out with his party buddy.

He's been asked numerous times not to drink on the property and he just says "yeah ok" then I catch him sneaking out and drinking next to the dumpsters. Apparently he thinks since I went for a walk down to the dog park with him and bought him a beer while we sat in the park and shot the breeze on Thanksgiving, it's ok for him to drink here. He doesn't understand the concept of "Don't crap where you sleep".

So tonight after he'd been hanging out with the buddy of his that introduced him to crack for the last few days he comes back and I find him out back sneaking a beer again. So, I grab my phone out of his hand, throw the beer in the dumpster, and tell him to go use a payphone and call someone to pick him up because I'm tired of hearing about it and he's not welcome here anymore.

While he's walking to the store I gather all of his crap and pile it up neatly outside the door.
So he comes back and I let him in to get anything I might have missed and he starts running his mouth because I followed him around to make sure he didn't steal anything, so I tell him to just get out and come back with an officer to get anything I missed. He refuses, so I pick him up and carry him out thinking that at this point I have the right to physically remove him from my home.

The police end up being called, and this is where it gets retarded, they told me that I have to go to court and have him evicted and that if I don't let him bring his stuff back inside the home, I am going to jail.
They also say that if he abandons the residence and takes all of his stuff with him then I don't have to let him back in, the catch is there's no way to prove he abandoned the residence, he could sit all of his stuff outside and say I threw it all out there.

It really sucks because my brother and I were really close for years and I pretty much trusted anything he said without question, but then I started finding out about him smoking crack, and the pieces started comming together.
I can turn a blind eye to a story about someone trying crack with a friend one time, even over the course of 2-3 days straight because I've seen how it works, but I draw the line as soon as I hear from their own mouth about them asking someone to get some for them before dropping their shorts and crapping on the side of a building in front of traffic in broad daylight, that's the sign of a crackhead. It's funny for sure, but I don't want it around me no matter who's doing it.

Apparently my brother is going to get off of work tomarrow come get his crap, and stay with someone else, but he also said that someone was on their way to help him get his stuff and leave tonight before the police got here so who knows.

I hope he finds somewhere to go and can do good, because he's the type that will just vanish when he has it good and I will not have to deal with him anymore.

I also learned it's a bad idea to say anything a Clearwater PD officer can interpret as calling him "a joke", they seem to forget everything that's going on and put their hands on their cuffs before they ask you to clarify what you said when you say anything like that. Be sure to apologise for the misunderstanding and rephrase it so it's clear that you mean the situation is a joke if you find yourself in that position. lol

I'm sorry for crying out loud but sometimes you just have to let this stuff out and preachers have more important things to deal with like unborn bastard childeren and people who kill their pet hampster.
Besides, knowing not to call police officers a joke is a very important piece of wisdom.
  • Anonymous
  • Bot
  • No Avatar
  • Posts: ?
  • Loc: Ozzuland
  • Status: Online

Post 3+ Months Ago

  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

I love being right.

I just went outside and found Mr "I have a ride and a place to stay" sleeping out on my picnic table in the complex courtyard.
I thought he was one of the bums that used to come over here from the day-labor place across the street so I went to wake him up to shoo them off and realized it's him.

After a quick conversation I discovered that Mr "I have a ride and place to go" actually doesn't have anyone who is dumb enough to come pick him up tonight nor does he have anywhere to go.
Then I discovered Mr "I work all the time" only has $27 and he can't afford to get a motel room for the night.

Lucky for him he gets payed tomarrow and will be able to get a motel room right down the street from where he works, and hopefully he'll learn the difference between saving his money and having a motel mini-fridge full of beer while he's there.

Now that he's not drunk he's not running his mouth when I try to tell him like it is, but rather admits he has nowhere to go and barely any money, and I almost feel sorry for him and want to let him in for the night because it's kinda cold outside.

Anywho, I made sure to turn the sprinkler heads towards the picnic table before comming back in since his dumb ass didn't think to sleep on the chairs in the screened in porch that's out there 10 feet away from the table.
  • SB
  • Moderator
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 8742
  • Loc: Aberdeen, Scotland

Post 3+ Months Ago

To be honest, as hard as it may be i think you've done the right thing. If you were as close as you once were then you evicting him like this should be the low he needs to feel to hopefully get his life back on track.

One of my older brothers went through a bad phase with drugs, although not the kinda that can be overly addictive thank goodness. However i saw how it was affecting him and how it in a way caused alot of tensions between him and my parents and the rest of the family.

Thankfully he now has got a stable job and a couple of years ago bought his first home.
  • George L.
  • Bronze Member
  • Bronze Member
  • George L.
  • Posts: 2209
  • Loc: Malaysia

Post 3+ Months Ago

It really sounds hard for you, Joe. I can not even give a word of advice as I have never experienced this myself.
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

I guess I should also mention that my brother has been working for maybe a month now, has no bills, pays no rent, and still, only has $27 to his name. That's ridiculous, I could get by for a week or more on $50 in that same situation.

Last night because the police were called someone had to leave to diffuse the situation, I'm guessing since he stunk of alcohol, the officers decided he was the one who should have left last night.

Legally I can not throw him out. I have to pay the courts to waste everyones time filing paperwork and serve him an eviction notice, and if I remember right that gives him 15-30 days before I can actually throw him out.

What I can do though, is make staying here completely intolerable and drive him to abandon the residence.
The fridge is mine, the appliances are mine, the couch is mine, the only thing he'll be able to do is lay on the living room floor and use the restroom and kitchen sink.
He works during the day as a meat cutter and I work mostly at night on the computer, he will be at work while I sleep and I work at home and can make plenty of noise doing it.

He just lucked out last night, my uncle on my dads side is retired from the Florida probation something or another and my father put the idea of not being able to be thrown out in his head because my father's an idiot and must think my landlord wants him gone instead of me and obviously fails to realize that these problems with him are eventually going to get me thrown out. Such an odd law caught me completely off guard is all. I'll have a work-around ready in no time.
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

lol. You being kicked off your own house? Seems like you are in a tight situation... I really don't have anything to say that would help but I guess I can say that I agree with the title :lol:
  • Bigwebmaster
  • Site Admin
  • Site Admin
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 9089
  • Loc: Seattle, WA & Phoenix, AZ

Post 3+ Months Ago

Yeah that sounds like a mess. What I don't understand is it doesn't sound like your brother has any legal ties to live where you do. Does he help pay the rent? Is he on any written agreements? How could he even prove he was living there? Seems ridiculous to me.
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

The officers went by a hamper full of clothes, a box with a few video games, a small box full of toiletries, and a stack of shirts and pants.

All of this stuff was sitting in a pile about 2X3 feet and the height of a hamper.

When the police got here I was sitting inside watching TV waiting for them, and he was outside.
they got here, talked to him outside, then came inside and explained the situation to me, they didn't ask any questions.

It just has to look like they've been living somewhere and as far as the police are concerned they do live there and you can not make them leave under Florida law.

I could stack my clothes and toiletries up in front of your house and call the police claiming that you illegally threw my stuff outside and they would force you to let me in the home.

He doesn't have to be paying any rent, any utilities, produce any mail with his name and the address on it, be on a lease or other legal document, or anything of the sort.

I can't help but wonder if the domestic crime rates in Florida are unusually high.
  • ATNO/TW
  • Super Moderator
  • Super Moderator
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 23456
  • Loc: Woodbridge VA

Post 3+ Months Ago

In North Carolina it's still illegal to have oral sex

Is relocation an option? Personally I've always seen you more as a New Yorker in NY rather than a NY retiree in FL Joe
  • ATNO/TW
  • Super Moderator
  • Super Moderator
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 23456
  • Loc: Woodbridge VA

Post 3+ Months Ago

Did I ever tell you about the opposite sex roommate I had to kick out of my Texas Apartment?
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

I'd imagine in Texas it's legal to shoot someone who refuses to leave the property with the way they do things, how did it go for you ATNO ?

Quote:
In North Carolina it's still illegal to have oral sex


Here in Tampa Florida it's illegal to be within 6 feet of a patron while giving them a lap dance, or to show bare breasts during a topless dance.
  • ATNO/TW
  • Super Moderator
  • Super Moderator
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 23456
  • Loc: Woodbridge VA

Post 3+ Months Ago

ATNO/TW wrote:
Did I ever tell you about the opposite sex roommate I had to kick out of my Texas Apartment?


She camped out thinking she was in Florida. We did have a roomy agreement, but after she drank $150 of my bar, ate $1000 of my food and didn't pay a dime of rent for two months enough was enough. Finally after she left one day tossed her crap onto the stairs and changed the locks. Maybe you couldn't do that in Florida but it worked in Texas.
  • digitalMedia
  • a.k.a. dM
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 5149
  • Loc: SC-USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

joebert wrote:
...or to show bare breasts during a topless dance.


Oxymoron Florida style! :)
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

digitalMedia wrote:
joebert wrote:
...or to show bare breasts during a topless dance.


Oxymoron Florida style! :)

I'de hate to live in Florida... makes me think that any bum or homeless hobo would be able to be able to get a good villa by placing a toothbrush in a sink or something... at least make the other (the true owner of the house) to pay money to get the bum evicted and kicked out.

Some revenge right there :x
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

You know, moving to NY doesn't sound like such a bad idea. I've had the thought cross my mind a few times before but never looked into it.

I've met a lot of people from NY in the time I've been here in Florida, and when I think about it, I've always gotten along with them better than I have anyone who lives here in Florida.
With the exception of the wannabe New Yorkers who moved here after spending maybe the first 5 years of their life in NY and think that makes them a New Yorker, those people drive me nuts.
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

joebert wrote:
You know, moving to NY doesn't sound like such a bad idea. I've had the thought cross my mind a few times before but never looked into it.

I've met a lot of people from NY in the time I've been here in Florida, and when I think about it, I've always gotten along with them better than I have anyone who lives here in Florida.
With the exception of the wannabe New Yorkers who moved here after spending maybe the first 5 years of their life in NY and think that makes them a New Yorker, those people drive me nuts.

How long have you lived in New York?
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

I've never been to New York Bogey.
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

Oh... I was just thinking about your last sentence there :lol:
  • celandine
  • Mastermind
  • Mastermind
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 2008
  • Loc: Belgrade, Serbia

Post 3+ Months Ago

that sounds really rough, joe - sorry to hear about it. sort of slightly reminds me of the days when my dad had a serious drinking problem, we wanted to throw him out of the house plenty of times...

the florida legal system does sound unspeakable though. seriously, what stops some creep from walking up to a fancy residence and claiming he was thrown out of it? I suppose most people don't know about that piece of legislation, is all..........

good luck sorting things out with your brother. hope he sees the light at some point. my dad did eventually, but only when a doctor told him he was going to be dead in a couple of months if he kept drinking the way he was.
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

celandine wrote:
that sounds really rough, joe - sorry to hear about it. sort of slightly reminds me of the days when my dad had a serious drinking problem, we wanted to throw him out of the house plenty of times...

the florida legal system does sound unspeakable though. seriously, what stops some creep from walking up to a fancy residence and claiming he was thrown out of it? I suppose most people don't know about that piece of legislation, is all..........

good luck sorting things out with your brother. hope he sees the light at some point. my dad did eventually, but only when a doctor told him he was going to be dead in a couple of months if he kept drinking the way he was.

That is a great motivation to stop someone from doing something... especially if it comes from a person who knows what he is saying.
  • celandine
  • Mastermind
  • Mastermind
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 2008
  • Loc: Belgrade, Serbia

Post 3+ Months Ago

yeah, it was the only thing that did the trick. our 10 previous years of yelling at him, reasoning with him, pleading with him, throwing things at him, and going into any other sorts of hysterics ultimately never changed a thing. he wasn't strong enough to quit for the love of his family, but he sure did quit for the love of himself. fair 'nuff I guess.............
  • dyfrin
  • Expert
  • Expert
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 503
  • Loc: WI

Post 3+ Months Ago

just change the locks, invite over some big guy who he doesn't know to answer the door and say you moved and this is his apartment now, and if he ever knocks again...
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

I finally got him out of here a couple of days after this happened and it's nice with him gone again. No more crackheads calling at all hours of the nite, I can watch TV or make popcorn at 5AM occasionally without having to worry about waking him up, I don't have to keep secret stashes of food I like hidden anymore.

Even my cat is happier now that he has his couch back.
  • ATNO/TW
  • Super Moderator
  • Super Moderator
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 23456
  • Loc: Woodbridge VA

Post 3+ Months Ago

The joy of bachelorhood! Enjoy it while you can before some woman trips you some day.
  • soul2skin
  • Newbie
  • Newbie
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 10
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

Well Joe I think you have the right idea with making his life miserable in your home.Just dont let him do anything,no games ,no beer,loud noise at night.Or you have some big guys come a physically remove him take him to dads house since he wants to butt in ,place his tooth brush by the sink.

Meat cutters make good money usually I dont see why he doesnt have his own place.

In my business I have had to rely on renting rooms or the few times I was in a good tattoo shop I made enough and had my own place.But from experience when relying on friends or family you absolutely must be respectful and compliant ,like you said dont *plum* where you eat.

Well good luck I hope this annoyance gets resolved.
  • Bogey
  • Genius
  • Genius
  • Bogey
  • Posts: 8388
  • Loc: USA

Post 3+ Months Ago

soul2skin wrote:
Well Joe I think you have the right idea with making his life miserable in your home.Just dont let him do anything,no games ,no beer,loud noise at night.Or you have some big guys come a physically remove him take him to dads house since he wants to butt in ,place his tooth brush by the sink.

Meat cutters make good money usually I dont see why he doesnt have his own place.

In my business I have had to rely on renting rooms or the few times I was in a good tattoo shop I made enough and had my own place.But from experience when relying on friends or family you absolutely must be respectful and compliant ,like you said dont *plum* where you eat.

Well good luck I hope this annoyance gets resolved.

He did solve it

Read the two posts before you :)
  • joebert
  • Fart Bubbles
  • Genius
  • User avatar
  • Posts: 13502
  • Loc: Florida

Post 3+ Months Ago

Things are never resolved when it comes to my "family", all any of them seem to do is cause me grief. My father took off with his second ex-wife (again...) to Georgia, hopefully he dies soon so at least I know that cycle is finished. All that guy ever does is make promises and run away.

I got new lease paperwork yesterday, 4 months early. They've NEVER sent me paperwork early in the 5 years I've been dealing with them.

I've got a bad feeling I'm going to get screwed because my brother was here now. However, I did get a scheduled notice telling me my rent went down instead of the usual rise earlier this year, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed about this being related.

Post Information

  • Total Posts in this topic: 27 posts
  • Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 57 guests
  • You cannot post new topics in this forum
  • You cannot reply to topics in this forum
  • You cannot edit your posts in this forum
  • You cannot delete your posts in this forum
  • You cannot post attachments in this forum
 
cron
 

© 1998-2014. Ozzu® is a registered trademark of Unmelted, LLC.