SITE REVIEW: Taxco Sterling Silver Jewelry

  • lucina
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Hello friends. Please comment or criticize our html sales letter
that we are near to launching. The foremost question we have
is HOW will this message be experienced (understood) by the viewer?

As traditional jewelry artisans from a traditional jewelry-making town,
we are so close to our subject that I am sure we can not see it clearly.

http://www.artcamp.com.mx/Ventas/Silver22/

This sales letter is designed for RETAILERS
It is the one that we would like to be reviewed.

Best wishes to all. And, in advance, THANK YOU.
  • Anonymous
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Post 3+ Months Ago

  • amit_it7
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Hi,
Your site colour combination is really not looking good at all...

hyperlink is not able to see with red background on first image
Some of the images are also not coming....
And also put your logo..
  • bobej
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Not sure of your intent here. Are you intending this as an email? As a link that you'll send via email? A page on your site?

It's completely unreadable, and I don't think it's just because of my lack of familiarity with your market. A quick skim through your page left me with no idea who your company is, what exactly your products are, why I should be interested in your products and what to do if I want to order them. Have a look at any major online retailer and make your page look like more like one of their category pages.

Some general tips:

- Do a spell and a grammer check (maybe by pasting your copy into MS Word and looking for underlines).
- Provide some kind of navigation at the top that will bring the user to important parts of the page, such as information about ordering.
- Walk users through what you want them to do. Layout your page so that it's a 1 2 3 process. For example, you could create sections like: Introduction, Products, Ordering.
- Be sure to highlight WHY someone should buy from you, but don't get wordy. Keep your pitch short, sweet and visible.

Good luck,

Bob Jamison
bob@kindakarma.com
http://www.kindakarma.com
  • Lord Kai
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Post 3+ Months Ago

I think it lacks organization. If it is a site. I think it should be broked definately into sections. Its to much content in one place. Its not very presentable at all. So my suggestion is break it up into a couple of pages.

Add a frame with links in the left and another iwth the content on the right. Its simple and easy if you just read up on it I suggest one of the simplist html help sites ever. It was designed for kids to comprehend it so it shouldn't be too hard. Its called http://www.lissaexplains.com
  • lucina
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Quote:
Hello friends. Please comment or criticize our html sales letter
that we are near to launching. The foremost question we have
is HOW will this message be experienced (understood) by the viewer?

As traditional jewelry artisans from a traditional jewelry-making town,
we are so close to our subject that I am sure we can not see it clearly.

http://www.artcamp.com.mx/Ventas/Silver22/

This html sales letter is designed for RETAILERS
It is the one that we would like to be reviewed.


Thank you for the comments - I will revise the page this evening.

This is an html sales letter
and intended to prompt the jewelry retailer prospect to
press the link indicating interest in the $97usd sample offer.

The link will take the prospect to our Shopping Cart where
the specific pieces or selections offered are visually specified
and where the prospect can register address and make payment.

Thank you for your comments - I will try to improve this sales letter.
  • lucina
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Hello friends: here is a working version of a re-make of our sales letter
to Retailers of Sillver Jewelry that takes into account comments received.

http://www.artcamp.com.mx/Ventas/Silver22-a/

This is NOT complete - it is just a try to simplify the presentation -

WHAT do you think?

Best wishes from Mexico!
  • lucina
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Hola over the weekend, I was able to refine the html sales letter somewhat
in response to the criticisms that were made that it was too hard to read -

This is still an imperfect version but I wonder if you think it much improved?

Also I connected the limportant link that leads to our Shopping Cart
even though the Shopping Cart is NOT fully operational as of today,
you can see and get an idea of how the sales letter will feed into it.

Anyone who will offer feedback and help us to improve this is very welcome.

Best wishes from mexico

http://www.artcamp.com.mx/Ventas/Silver22-a/
html sales letter > Taxco .925 Sterling Silver
  • rjasong23
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Post 3+ Months Ago

The new letter is definately an improvement, but I still must say that the letter should be more organized. It seems like one big long sentence without any structure. Consider using some tables, or even some headings and grouping into categories so that people can find what they want easier and faster.
  • janjanboban
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Post 3+ Months Ago

A real improvement from the top of this post.

The scrolling and scrolling down and down is an issue with the site I am currently giving a facelift too.

Making the page wider instead of so long and maybe making links to different topics instead of all being on one long page.

Like a newspaper would be hard to read if one story ran into the next. Sections are good.

I love the jewelry. wow!
  • jmweb
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Post 3+ Months Ago

great improvement between the 2 but the 2nd is still pretty unorganized.
  • grinch2171
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Organization is definitely lacking. It is also extremely long. I lost interest about a quarter of the way through it. Is there any way you can make it shorter. Possibly use thumbnails for the pictures and make them linkable to a bigger picture on your site. The second revision is big improvement from the first. Keep up the good work.
  • Shigeru
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Post 3+ Months Ago

Big improvement. But I question would you really want to put all that information in the one email?

What I would do is have a page worth which you email, which has a link to further information and display the rest. But the rest would be better split into different pages so the user doesn't feel overwhelmed by the amount of info on the page.
  • lucina
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Post 3+ Months Ago

thank you all for the cpmmentary on our sales letter - i will simplify it
and organize it further. Let me bring the following point forward :

This letter is for persons looking for a source of sterling silver jewelry.
We are contacted constantly because there is an extablished market
for the product. So, this letter is not really aimed at you people, who
are not in the jewlery business at all - so you tend to look at it as a
consumer would look at it - when we are addressing persons who
already have expressed an active interest in sourcing .925 silver jewelry.

still the points you have all agreed on, i am giving serious credibility

the final idea i think is to drive the interested parties to the $97usd offer
and the bonuses that are featured. i will try now to set it up so that the
offer and the link to the form that leads to the payment module is the
end of every section of the sales presentation. The people dont have
to go any farther than to the second screen to get the offer and the form

then about every second screen there will be another identical sales
letter and form - that way, people can read on, if they want further information, or they can simply place their order and wait for it to arrive
  • lucina
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  • Loc: Taxco, Mexico

Post 3+ Months Ago

i have made changes to simplify the presentation in the html sales letter

i think everything should lead to the acceptance of the 97.00usd$ offer -

http://www.artcamp.com.mx/Ventas/Silver22-a/

WHAT do you think? Is it still getting better?
  • pine_things
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Post 3+ Months Ago

in my opinion there are still too many different fonts sizes and colors.

maybe start with promotions or have them on the right hand side of the page.

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